I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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