A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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