Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Randomize
