i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
