I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
