I wish they made helmets for livers.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
