well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
