Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Randomize