Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
