I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
