i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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