Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
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