we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
