I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
