i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Are my feet made of real feet?
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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