Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
