i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
