Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
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