I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
