you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
