I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
