I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
