so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
