Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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