i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
