I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize
