There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize