my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Randomize
