Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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