how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize