Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
