The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
