if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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