Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
