I think i peed on brittanys purse
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
