At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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