Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
