Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
