Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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