U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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