I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
one might say we're banned from that church
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Randomize
