Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Randomize
