he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize
