are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
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