The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
