we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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