was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
