If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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