that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Randomize
