bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize